Today was not a good day. We’re
talking, spending an hour on the Veteran’s Crisis Line, just so I’d have
someone to talk to, someone I didn’t know, so I could believe somebody gave a
(expletive deleted) kind of bad day. And while that helped, it pretty much set
me up for the rest of the day’s crap to land on my freshly cleaned head.
Realized a few painful things, but there’s not much I can really do about any
of it now.. I can only wait things out, keep my eyes open, see how they play
out before I decide what I’m going to do from now on. Perhaps it’s succinct enough
to say it all started with the ILs text-nagging me all weekend about driving
them back to PreviousTown’s pharmacy, and being stuck taking another day to
drive for an hour, run to the pharmacy, clinic, 7-11 and their lunch again, in
100° weather. In short, an abbreviated
repeat of Tuesday, just with scorching heat instead of all-day rain, and no
trips to a fun thrift store. And Beloved Hubby just shrugged at my protests,
but didn’t stir himself to take care of their crap himself, although he had time to.
I’ve been letting how others
treat me determine how I treat myself, and that’s got to stop. I deserve
better. At least I got that much out of this whole crap sundae.
So, suffice to say, that by the
time I got back home, I was soaked in sweat, with a headache and some dizziness
that didn’t go away even after I was caught up on meds, downed four glasses of
ice water and a can of ginger ale, and munched a 3pm leftovers lunch. Truth be
told, I still have a headache, but a half-hour nap took care of most of the
dizziness. And next month, when they try this same bovine serenade, the car
will have a tragic flat tire, if I have to make it happen with a steak knife at
2am myself ! I am done with it for July, that’s for sure. I hate it when I’m
kind for one day, and am now obligated for life. Not the best situation for any
of us.
As you can imagine, I didn’t
get any sewing or embroidery done. And tomorrow’s Dearest Son’s Game Day. But I will get to have some ‘me’ time this
week if it kills me. It’d be nice to be needed, but it isn’t me they need, just
a free cab driver.
Sorry your day was so stinky, Dorrie. Yesh, you really shouldn't be getting out and over-exerting yourself in this awful heat and humidty! Have you talked to your doctor about these gruelling runs?
ReplyDeleteIt's pretty ridiculous that they expect you to ferry them about. I *know* there's got to be cabs/busses/other services that they could call on if they really wanted to. I think you're right to put your foot down, even if you have to temporarily block them from your phone to do it. :( Hope you're feeling better.
Sorry this happened to you. You really need to take better care of yourself and block/ignore messages from people who don't make your continued health a priority. Your son needs you to be strong and healthy, keep that in mind when you're tempted to give in.
ReplyDeleteThanks, ya'll. You're right, I can feel sorry as I possibly can for the ILs, but at day's end, what I do is up to me, and it's past time for me to take care of me first. Goss knows they don't have a problem with demanding that they come first ! I really appreciate the comforting words - it's like a big hug, twice !
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