Inspiration's where you find it...

Sorry yesterday’s entry was so abrupt, but it was basically the truth. I kind of loafed around all day, resting and reading. Done with Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone, halfway through Chamber of Secrets already. I have the first four books, found super-cheap in second-hand shops about a year after the last movie went to DVD. Stores just wanted ‘em off the shelves. Plus, everybody’d long since quit bugging me to read them. Now I can enjoy them (or not) my own way and in my own time. Now if they’d just settle down about Dr Who. Whoo, am I tired of hearing about that one !  

Beloved Hubby’s not well. He mowed the grass with an angle grinder set up as a weed whacker (don’t ask) Saturday, and evidently the pollen was a bit much. Seriously, though, he’s been working hard and studying hard and not sleeping hard, so it was kind of inevitable. I could get him to take naps that stretched into the night, but he’d be up at 1, 2am, unable to get back to sleep. Plus his boss has been kind of a jerk about him being off for my medical miscellany. I’m amazed Beloved could keep together this long. I felt lazy just watching him sleep.

So, while he rested and Dearest Son watched Meatballs after dinner, I sewed ! Oh, it wasn’t much, some test lines of stitching to make sure the cats occupying the Arena in my absence hadn’t knocked anything loose or any settings off. But that worked, so I decided to tackle a small alteration project – a doll blouse that needed a full open back with Velcro® to work for another doll. Luckily for me, Dearest found the scissors hiding under the sofa (where I’d already checked, hmmm…), so it wasn’t long before I had the open back part.

The rest went well, KJ sewed excellently, and the closures went in easily. I was about to put it on a doll when I noticed some spots on the sleeves. Also on part of the freshly halved back. Evidently somewhere between the 17^th and 53^rd time I picked the blouse off the floor, it’d gotten stained. Few minutes in the bathroom sink with some hand soap, and it’s all white again. Should be dry in time for tomorrow’s picture !

So, as June ends, Beloved and I feel better. I can sew – more and soon ! And he can breathe, which I can tell you, is a huge relief to us both !

Seriously.

On this day, here in City Of, absolutely nothing happened. 

Small efforts still mean recovering !

Even with the nebulizer, my chest has been tight all day. I was careful, though, and listened to m’self – I soon learned when to lift and shift, and when to rest. Most of my new medical equipment was blocking the closet, so after Beloved Hubby hoisted the metric ton of dirty clothes to the Laundromat last night, and brought home clean ones, it was kinda difficult to put it all away. I figured out that by donating a surplus of books I wasn’t gonna be reading again – including Angela’s Ashes, a great read, but too depressing to waft through twice – and getting a few other things ready to be donated, I could move the medical over by my side of the bed, rearrange a few boxes, and poof, now we can easily get to our clothes. Hopefully I’ll soon be out and about and can get those heavy books out of the 4Runner’s trunk.

It’s also easier for me to get to all my stuff when I need to. Employed an unused knitting stand to hold nebulizer supplies, then filled the hole in the nebulizer tube box with the bag of hoses that go to the oxygen exchanger and cylinders. The ‘torpedo’ – huge emergency O2 cylinder that’ll last for at least two days – is next to my window, out of the way, no longer a threat to toes, but its stand comfortably nestles the shoulder-bag cylinder when it’s not being used. The unused, bigger ones are in the living room. That reminds me, tomorrow I have to wash the exchanger filter…

Other than that, it was a quiet day. Beloved had to work, but was home early, looking exhausted. I got him down for a nap (hopefully one that lasts all night !) around 6pm. Thanks to me, Dearest Son has found the delights of Roger Corman car films – Eat My Dust!, Grand Theft Auto – starring Ron Howard. I think it’s funny that he’d been on Happy Days for years, but he didn’t share a single scene with Marion Ross (Mrs. Cunningham) in GTA.

Oh, and Netflix gets Bad Santa sometime in July. One of my favorites, definitely not for the kiddies ! Watch it in a bad mood – or a good one. 

Barometer's rising...have I mentioned how much I appreciate my nebulizer lately ?

Today I learned I have to say goodbye to jellybeans. I found one of the after-Easter 4/$1. bags from Dollar Tree and had just a few. Nowhere near what I used to eat in one sitting ! However, two hours later, my glucose testing showed a number higher than I’ve had since I got out of the ER. And it only went down a little several hours later. So, those sweet delights have got to go. Shame – it was only ten or fifteen ! I’ll hand out the rest to Dearest Son over the next few days, then not buy ‘em again. (sigh) Probably the same goes for most candy, too…

But, it’s for the best. I’ve lost nearly 25 pounds since June began, and I want to keep losing, not gain back ! Heck, thanks to my time in the hospital, I’m not even hungry as often as I was. Still weak as a newborn kitten some days, but it’s kind of ‘one step forward, half-step back’, it seems. Just this week, I drove FIL around, got m’self to the VA, cleaned up some, and cooked ! Tomorrow, I wanna redo the bedroom somewhat, even though it’s supposed to rain and my chest is tight – it’s like that when the barometer is rising.

I’m still hoping to sew soon…

My day Thursday !

We have the sweetest, most dear family friends ever. I think S. has been a little worried about me since we visited last Wednesday, because she said her son, O., has missed Dearest Son – they’d love to have him over for the day today. So he went with Beloved Hubby, who was working nearby, this morning, and I’ve had the day to m’self.

I’ve done about what you’d expect with it. Slept. Started reading our copy of Angela’s Ashes that we got from the Previous Town thrift for 25¢ - man, that book is depressing. I only read it during breathing treatments, so it’s not weighing too heavily on my mood.

Of course, I’ve indulged m’self as much as I can, although we’re pretty broke for now. It was kind of funny, but in the hospital, I started wanting cornbread. I actually got some one day, but it had corn, jalapenos, and tomatoes in it, and  what wasn’t vegetables wasn’t good enough to go after. While I had other options for lunch, when I really thought about it, I was still dreaming of cornbread. So I made some, and ate half of it. How broke can you be when your tummy’s full and you got what you wanted ?

Only problem is, now that I cleaned up my sewing Arena from where the cats have claimed it in my absence – and pretty much knocked over, pushed off, or otherwise hidden everything that was there – I can’t find my good scissors. Of course, no one else has seen them in weeks. (sigh) Well, I’ve been wanting a new pair anyway, just didn’t wanna shell $20. for ‘em right now. Darn.

The VA just looooves my blood for some reason...

I feel kinda bad about telling an unkind story yesterday, so here’s a better one. Had to drive m’self to the VA today for a blood draw. Just that, nothing else, and even though he offered, I just couldn’t see Beloved Hubby taking half a day off work to drive me. Time to buck up and start taking care of some of the stuff that’s been on his shoulders far too long. My Doctor emphasized that there was no specific time, or even date, for my lab work, long as I got there and identified m’self, when wasn’t important, long as it was today or later. It was relatively cooler, and I was breathing OK, still a bit tired from yesterday, but if I got it done early enough, I’d have all day to rest. And after yesterday, I was pretty confident I could manage it ! So, at 9am – to avoid CapitolCity traffic – I was on my way.

Forgot about the humidity and having to park at the back 40. Oxygen tank notwithstanding, I was wheezing by the time I got to the doors. Turns out, the VA runs a little golf-cart tram, but I only see it when it’s already at the doors or further away from the 4Runner than I am. Besides, I still need the exercise. It wasn’t long before I was signed in and waiting my turn.

That’s when I met a really nice older gentleman. I was initially attracted to his shirt, which proclaimed him a graduate of Southern Battlefield High School. I was born at Southern Battlefield City, which was in a different state, but still… I smiled at him and invited him to sit beside me – few chairs were available – because I was lonely and he looked like a fun date. He laughed. And before I went before the fangs of modern medicine, I got to hear about his sadly deceased wife, his struggles with the poodle he adopted, but the pooch led him to his current girlfriend, who’s a part-time dog trainer, so everything was working out.

It felt so nice, just sitting there and listening to someone else, with other folks crowding in a bit, inching towards the conversation. He had a ring of company when my name was called – my seat was not long vacant. I got a wink from him as I left, gauze around my arm, and the idea of a nice nap caressing my mind. I’m glad he wore that shirt today !  

And I had the best nap ! 

Is it still a good day if I can say I lived through it ?

Today, it happened. The breathing treatment I was so worried about getting Friday night was tiresome today when I woke m’self up to take the last one of the day. Not four days in, and I’ve already gone from desperate to disdainful !

Although today was a bit of a challenge. Flush with my successful cooking yesterday – if you can call Stuffing with Chicken Bits for lunch actual cooking – I decided that I needed more tasks under my belt for confidence. So I fried up some going-fast eggs for breakfast and told FIL that I’d do my best to get MIL to the library today. From there, everything seemed to take longer than expected, even my shower. But I’d given m’self plenty of time to make sure I had enough energy to get my self-assigned job done, so I wasn’t worried.

What I wasn’t expecting was FIL, who added going to the UPS Store to mail some boxes back to DirecTV, to alter the day’s plans as we were backing down the driveway. He knew right where it was, wouldn’t take but a minute. Three turn-arounds later – including an illegal U-turn right in front of a cop ! – I found it. Arrrgh. The deed done, did I get thanked ? Of course not. I got, and I quote, “Only took five minutes. Too bad it took three weeks.” Well, I went off. I was being nice in the first place, never mind that I was getting weaker by the second, didn’t know if I had the focus to get to the library, and he pulls this ? So I snapped back, “Oh, sorry. Hospital has this stupid rule about keeping people there until they’re gonna live. I’ll have to talk to them about that, I’m sure it’s a big inconvenience to lots of people.”  Wisely, neither of us said another word.

Of course, a single block from the library, FIL informs me that it’s election day, but he’s sure it won’t bother what he needs to do. Um, FIL ? I promised Dearest Son he could look at the DVDs, and I had a book on hold to snag. Parking in the way-the-heck-out-there kind of interferes with my plans. Nothing for it, I dragged about a block away as he took to his heels before the 4Runner even stopped.

Eventually I got there - and proceeded to be violently ill in the Library bathroom. As if I wasn’t weak before…  Somehow we got what we needed to do done – all FIL did was drop off books – and I poured m’self back in the car. The drive home is a blurry smear in my memory, but at least the bedroom was nice and cool, and I had some sweet sugar-free red kool-aid to restore my energy. I even took my breathing treatment without whining too much.

Sure, it looks like 'DevilBliss' at first, but it is sooo saving my life ! Please meet my nebulizer...

My albuterol ! It’s here in today’s mail – thank Everything ! We’ve had the nebulizer device since my Wednesday appointment, but not the medicine for it, and, frankly, it was kind of close last night. While I’ve been told repeatedly that my inhaler is the exact same thing, the nebulizer works so much better for me – and watching air-sickness bags being used as weapons in some noxious Spy Kids film Dearest Son selected was enough to make me wonder if last night was gonna be the night I didn’t make it.

Had some horrible dreams, woke up a lot, but I made it through. Beloved Hubby may have suspected something, and brought me a huge sugar-free coffee before he had to go to work. Coffee was perfect. I was getting enough air to get by, but I was still tight… so glad mail was early today. I’ve done three of my four prescribed treatments today and already feel so much better that I slept most of the day.

I know, seriously. It’s like, I’m finally breathing well enough to sleep ! Still, it’s a good thing, as even with the oxygen therapy, my sleep’s been spotty at best. I’m wondering if I’ll sleep at all tonight, with all these catnaps – or if I’ll sleep like a loaf of Dorrie, the way I have all day ?

Give me a week, and I may be back to almost-recovered ! I wanna sew so bad…

That center dress looks familiar...can't quite put a finger on it, but...

The Pixie Faire freebie was the sweet, ruffly Faraway Downs dress, not the sleek, streamlined San Reno, but it’s very pretty, I can use the heck out of that bodice, and it’s the best price, free ! So I snagged it. It seems so silly to want to buy patterns still when I get so many for free, but there’s so much I wanna learn to do – and so many ‘looks’ I want for my dolls ! - and the ones I like that’ll do what I want aren’t often given away. It does help, though, to go through what I have once in a while. I’ve eliminated two patterns from the ‘want’ file because I found that I already had them, but didn’t know it. Sure, maybe the newer one is easier, but as part of watching my spending, I should at least try what I already got first !

Forgot to mention that we got a newer freebie loveseat for the Study and tossed our older, stinkier one out. I swear, a gallon of Dollar Tree knock-off Febreeze couldn’t begin to KO the smell of beer on that thing. I’m glad it’s gone – we don’t drink beer, but I was getting a buzz just straightening out the cushions. This one is actually more worn, but it smells much better ! 

I actually bought this one - but there's a reason to my questionable spending !

Woke up with lights flashing behind my eyelids. Thunderstorm or migraine ? Could have been both. It was raining hard and my head felt like a split, leaking melon. Ranks when a light fun day for everyone else is enough to put you to bed early and keep you there ‘til midmorning. Just between us, I’m still wiped out, but I can’t lie abed all day. Nobody will bring me my computer in there !

Tell ya a secret. I’m hoarding patterns again. Just not Barbie ones anymore, I got tons of those suckers ! Nope, I’ve been squirrelling away any free American Girl ones I find on Pinterest or just plain online, since they’ll mostly fit Timey and Dottie and Chatty, and with alterations, fit the DP&M  girls, too. Sometimes, it’s enough to just have the shape of the design, that can be expanded or altered to fit other sizes. Been visiting Pixie Faire frequently – they have lots of designs I like. Too bad I can’t get most of ‘em in MH sizes ! I haven’t yet bought any, but every week or two, they do giveaways, and I’ve been all over those. Tomorrow they’re gonna give one of four patterns for BFC,Ink (Best Friends Club) dolls, I don’t even care which one, they’re all great. While I know they won’t fit DP&M without alteration, thanks to another freebie pattern, I’m looking forward to scoring one just the same. Who knows what I’ll get out of it ? If you’re curious, hit the Pixie Faire main page, slide over to ‘Freebies’, and select ‘Freebies & Giveaways’ from the drop down menu. The winner is normally downloadable from the main page Friday morning. I admit, I am sorta partial to the San Remo dress…

Even if you’re not into AG or Ellowyne, or any of the other dolls they publish patterns for, there’s lots of good ideas, tips, and tutorials also under the Freebies header, might be worth your time. Hope you find something worth downloading !

Come to think about it, I think there’s been only one non-99c Simplicity pattern I’ve bought in AG size. It’s this one, and I got it mostly for the tutorial on color blocking. Gosh knows the simple dress is easy enough to replicate without buying it !  I’ve read  the tutorial twice, but nothing seems to be ‘sticking’ lately, which is kind of why I’ve been reluctant to sew. There’s two more Etsy creator-made-and-sold patterns I’d like to have, but until I can round my rear back into the sewing Arena chair, it seems like a waste to buy them. Maybe I can bribe m’self…?

They made a tea set just for them, but the DTree one is more for less !

Today was both fascinating and wearying. I had my follow-up appointment with my usual doctor, and things are looking well – we even got a nebulizer ! I have to go back in two weeks for some lab work, but it’s just that, give a little blood to the lab, and I’m on the way home. She’ll call me with results. We verified my weight loss, and my blood oxygen levels are good – of course, the cannula helps with that ! I learned that, long as someone else (preferably Beloved Hubby) is driving, I can administer a diabetic test in a moving car. Could probably give m’self insulin afterwards, too, but luckily, I haven’t needed much of that !

Doctor said I’m still recovering, so feeling weak and tired is still gonna be part of my day for at least another month. That was a relief ! I was starting to worry. I’m to rest when I feel I need to, and do what I can. So, I’m doing it right !

Dearest Son also had an appointment, and we got to hang out with S. and her family for a bit in between. It felt so good to have a bit of social time. S. has the best grapes, too – I need to ask her where she gets them. I also got to thank her for her ‘get well’ gift, because thanks to her and K. and O., I now own the Monster High Uno game. It’s really pretty – I almost want a second deck, just to display with the dolls.  

And today, I learned that Dearest is exactly the same height as me. Wow. He always seemed to be my little one…and now he’s well on his way to being taller than I ever will. He got caught up on his shots and had prescriptions refilled – and he has another appointment at the first of July, about his seizures. Here’s hoping all goes well there, too.

And I hope no medical emergencies loom on your horizon, for sure ! 

Is it just me, or does Belle strongly resembles Selina Gomez .. .?

Today I got over my fear of doing some housework. You can say I’ve always been afraid of that, and I’d agree, but poor Beloved Hubby’s going nuts trying to keep everything together. So today, I earned some rest by darn near wearing m’self out with laundry. Got most put away, the rest sorted for a Laundromat trip. Give me a few more days, and I should be able to take it there m’self. Long as I use the small baskets – I could barely lift the big one full before all this started !

I also had a full day with no insulin injections, save for the overnight one I always have to take. I’ve stabilized my numbers enough so that I didn’t need more, at all, all day long. I’ve also lost twelve pounds somewhere, now that I have the scale working again. If you see it, either let me know or poke it into the trash with a stick for me, please !

Recovery seems to be taking longer than I thought...

It’s the little things that keep reminding me I’m ‘getting better’ instead of ‘am better’. I keep falling asleep at the drop of a hat, grasping insanely every time the cannula goes one way and my nose goes another, making sure I always know where the inhaler is (preferably three feet from my claws at any given moment), and bolting awake realizing I hadn’t really dealt with all this – only to fall back asleep, figuring there wasn’t that much left to deal with by now anyway.

That’s not exactly true, but I can’t really deal with it on a blog, now can I ? What gets me is how scared I am of everything, all of a sudden. Scared to drive, scared to go anywhere, scared to even sew. It’s irrational, and I’ll have to deal with it, but give me a couple more days, please ? I may feel weak now, but deep down I am strong, I just need to access my strength and it’s a challenge when my reach seems so short. It’s growing, though, every day I don’t give up and sleep all day. Shame sleep is so nice….

Anyway, at least I can bring back photos ! Here's the last doll I bought, a Tolly Tots Belle, from my fave thrift. No shoes, but, hey, I got the crown this time ! Tomorrow, you get the 'after' photo - since all she needed was a brush-out, she cleaned up very nicely. And now I have a Belle that doesn't look like Princess Dorrie ! Yaaay ! 

Pictures return tomorrow - I promise !

Oh, how glorious breathing is, when you can wake without wheezing ! Even housecleaning becomes a joy when you can breathe and get so much done, with a few breaks.

C&C was due today, to deliver my oxygen therapy supplies, and the house was a wreck. So I got the litter box emptied, a place for the cylinders cleared, swept the whole living room and hallway where the concentrator was going to go (it ended up in the unswept bedroom, arrrgh !), swept the Study while I was at it, relocated clean and dirty laundry, and got a good start on moving the grocery stash. Now that the IL’s have their own kitchen, they don’t raid the supplies anymore ! Unfortunately, half the pantry shelves are taken over by Beloved Hubby’s tools…

So, I’m now back on my O2, and I’ve not had so much as a wheeze since I got home yesterday. Time to move on from that ! I know I didn’t get to tell you about the week before I ended up in hospital, the first of June, so it’ll be fun to do so now. It involves dolls !

I was feeling pretty good then, and actually had some money. So we took a day to go shopping ! The $12. I planned to spend on patterns at Hancock Fabrics turned to $30., but I finally had my grommet/eyelet setting problem solved. Who knew Hancock’s would have sturdier tools designed specifically to do that one thing ? It’s another large crimper, same price as the flimsy one I bought at Hobby Lobby, but I had a 40% off coupon there, too. I also snagged a couple remnants, for kicks.

Believe it or not, I didn’t spend a dime at TRU, even though they had two of the Freaky Fusion dolls, Sirena von Boo and Bonita Femur, and the Zombie Shake set of Venus and Rochelle. Those last two were tempting, but honestly. You’re gonna call a line Zombie Shake and not feature your two very prominent zombies ? This is pretty much where I broke with MH, sad to say. It’s been months since they were announced and peeked, along with the werecat twins in the same line, and still no Ghoulia or Slo Mo. Sorry, Mattel. You really dropped the ball here, and I feel I’ve already spent enough. Not one deluxe, awesome Ghoulia, even in a line based on her monster species, when most of the other cast has had several ? Sorry, I’ll be over here playing with what I already have and not spending endless hours anymore chasing more down – when I can calm down enough to play. Right now, to be honest, MH is a few dolls on my desk, not much else.

However, Dearest Son spent most of his saved up allowance there,  which added to previous spending should earn me another $5. gift certificate in the next month or six. Probably use it on the new set of Journey Girls shoes in hopes that half will fit the Disney Princess & Me dolls.

The glittery accessory store played fast and loose with its signage – no wonder they’re closing – so I didn’t spend as much there as I planned. Got three strap bracelets that work great as doll belts, but I found an Etsy seller with much better prices, so I limited m’self to the basics, white, black, brown. If they’d been the dollar all the signs trumpeted ( ‘$1.99 for bracelets’ in a font you could only read standing two feet from the display), I would have spent about $15. there, instead of six bucks. The Etsy seller’s are less than a dollar each, even with postage. Only reason I haven’t ordered yet is because things are thin since I got sick – Beloved’s had to take off a lot of work for me.

But I sure had fun when we had it ! Got a delicious cookie snack and some overpriced nostalgic candy and we were off again. My energy was already getting low, but we couldn’t resist hitting the Flea Market on the way home. Yaaay ! I snagged a Babysitter’s Club doll, one of the few I didn’t score back when I had Crissy, for a dollar – and yes, her clothes fit DP&M, thanks to stretchy knit fabrics ! I also found an oversized plastic shoebox stuffed fulla fabric scraps for $3., so I was happy. Dearest was thrilled with his Hot Wheels-size Knight Rider car, which he’s into now.

I barely had enough reserve power to get Dearest the slushie I promised, but the chips I bought – and about a half-hour stripped down under the window AC unit Beloved installed the night before – helped restore me. I had a blast folding fabric. Lots of reds, three blue and green Christmas linen napkins, and enough of a wild pink and blue floral to make clothes for me, with judicious cutting. Shorts and a scrub top, maybe.

Sewing tonight – unless I fall asleep ! Now that I can sleep, I do so much of it…

Even I don't believe this...

Had half an entry typed, but I had to erase it. It was mostly more ranting about my hospital room-mate, so it’s best deleted. Besides, returning to the ER this morning was much more exciting !

Yup. My chest has been getting tighter and tighter since I got back, and I didn’t want it to get as bad as it did before. So once I was pretty sure it was out of my management and control, I hit the 911 button again. I thought it was hard to call them the first time. Second time in less than three weeks is a lot harder, truly.

I didn’t get admitted this time, but I did get the O2 treatment we asked about, several times before my discharge. Turns out, I was approved for it, but no one followed through when it was time for me to leave. I understand, oxygen therapy is freakin’ expensive, they don’t want to just pass it out like aspirin, but I really do need it. Five hours later, Beloved Hubby and I were on our way home, an E cylinder riding along, to get me through today. The home service, let’s call them C&C, will be here tomorrow with more and a concentrator. Concentrators pull O2 from the air, so I’m not on a cylinder all the time. I can save the cylinders for when I’m out and about. They’re the same guys who took care of me years ago, so I about know how it’s gonna work. I’m approved for six months right now, and depending, I can be re-upped every year after that.

We stopped for a fast-food feast definitely not on the American Diabetes Association Meal Plan, but we both wanted to celebrate. Between stress, not sleeping much in the hospital, barely sleeping at all last night, and that huge meal, I crashed for three straight hours. Oh, it felt so good. Tagged Beloved so he could get some rest – he’s been driven nuts this past month, and, if anything, has been sleeping even less than me. Your beloved’s pain is always worse than your own.

We were trying to get an O2 concentrator on our own, since we had a prescription on file, but it was either shell out $900. to $2000. we didn’t have, or $250. a month to rent one. We didn’t have $250. right now either, and were hoping I’d be OK ‘til Friday. Or possibly Monday, since most medical supply places around here are closed Saturdays and Sundays. I more or less knew this morning I couldn’t hold out that long.

Took a half-hour to peel off all the sensor pads and bandages – I’d been so tired, I crashed solid with them still on. Then I had such fun playing online again. Had to clear 260+ new messages and another 200 older ones out of my e-mail in-box. My ‘save’ folder is now bulging ! Dearest Son’s taking it pretty well, although seeing me get loaded into the ambulance made him cry, ‘I just got my momma back, and you’re taking her away again !’. I reassured him as best I could, but I’m soooo glad I didn’t  have to be admitted.

I feel so much better. And happier ! I may actually get to play with my dolls – and finish the dress I was working on – tomorrow ! 

Hi ! I’m back !

It only seemed like I’d vanished or died. Truth be told, I’ve been in the hospital for quite some time. Seems the real reason I was so weak and having trouble breathing was a cascade of issues. Had bronchitis – didn’t know it – so I treated my asthma, and the inhalers hiked my blood sugar to insane heights and didn’t help. But now my circulation was suffering, so I had some kidney damage, and it didn’t do much for my heart, either. I nearly passed out from lack of air, so I called 911, and felt like I was in a subway tunnel after a sticky rainstorm of panic by the time the paramedics got a breathing mask on me. Rode an ambulance for the for the third time in my life up to the VA ER, where they nearly admitted me on the spot. They were having trouble finding me a room. This whole time, I figure I’ll get a breathing treatment or two and be home for a slightly late supper. That’s always what happened  before…

Ended up with five doctors, each of whom had to sign off to the head honcho before I could leave, and because I had several diseases and issues going on at once, it wasn’t a quick thing like I believed. Believe this or not, your local McD’s has better Wi-Fi than the VA hospital here. I wouldn’t have minded being there soooo long if I could have distracted m’self with a little research and such.

I also got the weirdest room-mate – that’s how crowded it was, we were sharing a room designed for one patient – who suffered from her own plague of illnesses. Seriously, I think plague was the only thing she didn’t have. She kept asking me what a colonoscopy was like, and I kept having to tell her I have no idea, I’ve never had one, but she’d had one three years ago. She also whined and complained so much about being there for one day – I’d been there five by then – that I started whining about going home, too. Mostly to escape her !

She picked up two grifters in the open patio smoking area – um, no, there's never been a 23-year-old Sergeant Major Apache pilot, especially when he confesses he’s not paid support for any of his 13 kids, ever. His girlfriend said she was pregnant with five of his kids (yeah, quints) and due any day, plus she’d personally rescued Jessica Lynch and shot a Taliban leader in his left eye. Of course, she’s also an officer… and weighs more than me, pregnant or not – and they were her constant companions. Which is what roomie wanted, I’ve never seen such an attention vacuum. She even distracted doctors who were there to see me ! She called my respiratory therapists ‘respory (sic) terrorists’ when they wouldn’t move furniture or plug her equipment in for her. She never did anything if someone else was around to do it for her – and she wasn’t even ill, she told me, she was just there for a colonoscopy ! The Grifters (sounds like a nice family name !) got her money and introductions to other people they soaked for cash with a well-sung sob story. A poorly written one easy to disprove, but I guess their victims were too busy thinking on the higher things. Like, should you offer a pregnant woman a Marlboro or a Kool ? She smoked both.

Why they were currently homeless and sneaking into all-night restaurants and public patios in Downtown Capitol City is a story worthy of a movie, if anyone could believe two minutes of it. It's epic. And something I would pay money to forget I ever heard, so I'm not putting it here. You're welcome. 

Thank Everything I got out of there before I had to hear all about her colonoscopy story 15 times. She never said anything just once. She told me the same anecdote four times in one afternoon, and the last time, I told her the punchline before she got to it. I got five minutes of confused silence out of that trick. Beloved brought my computer the first day, and I became reacquainted with everything besides internet it can do. He brought in Frozen and Bad Santa with my headphones the next day. Local channel only TV was so bad, neither of us bothered to turn the single set on at all most days.

I’m still weak and wheezing a bit, but it’s much better than where I was two weeks ago, there’s barely a comparison. Oh, and I’m now a full-fledged diabetic, I gave m’self my first insulin shot yesterday. (sigh) But I really think getting that controlled and managed is what’s giving me some energy back. So, nothing bad without some good in it, it usually works out that way. I’m still adjusting to the new normal, but I’ll be OK.

Hope things are going well for you ! Missed ya !